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 Your favorite Darwin Award moment

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bdobbins79
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PostSubject: Your favorite Darwin Award moment   Mon May 19, 2008 11:52 am

This is for fun, post any story about some dumb-ass doing as a dumb-ass would do. It should get some laughs.

This is my favorite of all time:

1990ís, United States, in the southwest: a small-time hood (about to be even smaller) broke into the home of a World War Two veteran and stole .. the old G.I.'s .45 automatic pistol, which he used in battle in the 1940's. The hoodlum then reported directly to a local convenience store and proceeded to rob the cashier while brandishing his new pistol. .. Our thug .. decided he didnít want to leave a witnesses. .. He leveled the pistol at the cashier and pulled the trigger. "CLICK!" went the gun. .. As it turned out, the WWII veteran had WWII vintage ammunition in his WWII vintage pistol. Priming caps over time are known to lose their "spontaneous" nature, particularly if stored improperly, causing what is known as a hang-fire: The primer smolders into a delayed ignition. .. Just as the puzzled crook had the barrel pointed squarely at his own eye, the hang-fired primer detonated, sending a half-inch chunk of lead and associated hot combustion gases directly into the felon's skull at 900 feet per second. The range was less than six inches. The body could only be identified by fingerprints.

Here is a link to alot of good ones:

http://www.fenice.info/start.asp?p=/english/darwin.asp
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GT_Fox
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PostSubject: Re: Your favorite Darwin Award moment   Tue May 20, 2008 10:24 am

This one is pretty good...

The telephone company was replacing above-ground telephone lines with buried lines. In one sparsely populated farming area, if lines crossed a country road they would dig a trench halfway across, so rural traffic could continue through. Then they would fill in the trench, and dig a trench on the other side.
One morning, local farmers called the sheriff to report a smashed-up pickup. Inside were two ranch hands who were last seen the previous night, heading home after last call. You see...
On their way to the bars, the men had decided to play a prank. They stopped their pickup, and moved the flashing warning signs from the trenched side to the good side of the country road. Crime scene analysis later confirmed that they were the culprits who moved the flashing stands. Investigations also revealed that at the time of the accident, they were driving at an excessive speed with an impressive amount of alcohol in their systems.
No crime scene analysis is capable of determining whether the ranch hands forgot their prank, or chose to see what would happen if they hit that trench at a high rate of speed in the middle of the night.
No good prank goes unpunished.
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IrishE
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PostSubject: Re: Your favorite Darwin Award moment   Thu May 29, 2008 12:36 pm

Something to think about doing if you're real lonely on a Friday night..........

August 2006, Florida) A scuba diver was bitten on the lip when he attempted to kiss a nurse shark. The bite was a surprise to the diver, as he had kissed hundreds of sharks. He explained, "You pick 'em up, rub their belly, scratch 'em, hug 'em, might as well give them a smooch while you're there."
Past performance is no guarantee of future results. This shark took exception to his unwanted advances, and bit his lip. To add insult to injury, a group of snappers came in for a few nibbles, too.
Luckily, a patient plastic surgeon was able to repair his mangled lip. "It was a matter of completing the puzzle and putting (a hundred little pieces) back together again," Dr. Mike Kelly said.
Has the diver learned his lesson? Apparently not! He simply plans to modify his amorous technique: "Don't kiss a nurse shark while it's upside down."
One reporter remarked, "Better still, don't kiss them at all."
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